Something has been cropping up inside me. I do not know what is it.

And I feel like I'm some despicable shit of crap. Why can't I live a normal life like others and blog like some normal person? Why must I be the pathetic one to blog and get like jeered at for? I've attempted to change myself before. But no matter how much time I try, it always fail.

And I definitely know who you were pointing to. No doubt, you are pissed with me, but I do not see the point why you are fingering me? It's like I know you think I do not see you as a friend or whatever but I've been changing and trying to change peoples' perspective of me. And you know what? I failed. Sounds disgusting huh? But that's the reality. I do not care if you detests me sitting beside right you every morning, I know you must feel obligated to sit beside me, but this entire year 1 has been shit for me alright. I do not know why you must pin-point everything that you hate to me, can't you just say it right in front of me? You need not post it elsewhere. And you know something? You were the one that made me realize that being a loner is super "fun" okay? Ha, why am I even trying to post what I'm thinking about you on my blog. Also, I trust you did not block me, but can I even trust your words? Three sentences of whatever?

By the way, Bryan, if you ever see this post, I apologise for letting it out. That was because x linked it somehow then I blurted it out. I'm really sorry...